Armed and Akimbo: Vogue Hommes International

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Not Yo' Mama's United Colors

Children at play. Seriously, what are they, five? Does it make me a pedophile that I'm turned on by this? Well, call me Roman Polanski.

Does anyone else get Talking Heads video from this or have I been sniffing too much glue? Also, an all fuchsia look is surprisingly great. And Elmer's is surprisingly potent...

Never a fan of ponchos, these colorful numbers could be thrown on over anything, rain or shine.

Be still my pedophilic heart...well, I'll be living in exile in France if you need me. And obviously avoiding those bastard Swiss.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Fétiche Akimbo // That's Fetish In Franche

The kilt honestly is just a reason for men to cross-dress. Nothing wrong with that, says the amazing cougar Carine Roitfeld, who styles for Patrick Demarchelier's shooting in this month's Vogue Hommes International. A length that hits at the knee works with a top gone grunge and lots of layers of knits, t-shirts and leather. Filthy hair helps as well.

All the (armed and akimbo) Single Ladies...

Dolly
From the wreckage of Lady Parton's forgotten hairsprayed wigs rose the petit and honey blond Dolly, anatomically male but emotionally an enlightened gay fashionista. A product of overzealous heteronormative familial units, Dolly flighted from rural America in a denim DKNY jacket (currently on view at the Met), moved to the West Village, and now canters daily to the AnA loft in ornate heels and Balmain. In between snacks of tap water and the occasional stick of gum, this yoga devotee (because Christy said so) ponders fashion history, personal styles of the rich and fabulous, trends in fashion editorials, and of course whatever shiny things catch her eye.

Ms. Ross
Whilst sabotaging the careers of any pretenders to her throne of super-cunty divadom, Ms. Ross managed to pick up an American Vogue (this was ages before it's disappointing homogenization, natch) and was inspired by the colorful and intoxicating images therein. Before you can say "I'm Coming Out," Ms. Ross secured an internship in the hallowed, cashmere walls of the mag and her career in fashion began in earnest. Now a self-styled fashionista, Ms. Ross can be found stomping down the runways of Paris and Milan, throwing tantrums for the hell of it and vomiting up lunch in the trendiest of restaurant bathrooms.

Ms. Streisand
A young Jewish ingenue from deep, deep, deep Brooklyn, Ms. Streisand boarded a blue tugboat clad only in an orange dress, fur hat with matching muff and booked it straight for Manhattan, where she lived the first six months fresh and free at Isaac Mizrahi's Garment District studio. Finding work as a fit, showroom, and presentation model beneath her, this lady of naught but seventeen years traded in her four-inch stilettos for the bright lights of Broadway and the broad shoulders of at least three wealthy financiers, all of whom have disappeared under mysterious circumstances. Despite protests from fans, Ms. Streisand is currently pondering moving to New Jersey to participate in the Real Housewives series.

Armed and Akimbo

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Not Yo' Mama's United Colors

Monday, March 30, 2009

Fétiche Akimbo // That's Fetish In Franche

who dat

All the (armed and akimbo) Single Ladies...

AKIMBO MAIL!

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