Meanwhile...

Why isn't the tranny in the middle grabbing that crotch? Let's make use of the props, girls. This isn't fucking amateur hour.

Feeling a Bit Weary...

I decided to pop a squat. This chair's uncomfortable as sin, but who needs comfort with those arms. Am I right, ladies?

Oops-There-Goes-My-Kids-All-Over-Your-Face Akimbo / Reflection Erection

Mouthed and Agape / If You Like It Then You Better Put A Quilted Chanel Doughnut In It

Words are utterly failing me in my attempt to describe the perfection of this editorial. Finally something worth celebrating!! Something that actually leaves me speechless (so speeeeechleeesss).

Sure, the other plus-size photos were OK - but we, girls, have reached epic proportions in this gem.

All Chanel, all blonde, all gaping, all tits, all tranny, all eleganza extravanganza.

This bitch owns everything... and if you're looking, I'm pretty sure you can find it under one of those rolls.

Based on the Novel 'Turning It' by V

Future Oscar and current Golden Globe nominee, Gabourey 'Gabby' Sidibe, star of Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire graces the cover of V, out January 14th. All I can say is big girl, you are beautiful.

V's doing this big ole size issue --which looks great-- so clearly they couldn't let the girl just have a cover. Instead, its one of two. The other features future multiple Oscar-winner and a personal fave of Dolly, Dakota Fanning.

Kittenish. Big 60s hair. Flawless. But does anyone find offense with the captions, "Big Love" and "Little Lady?"

Hallowed Be Thy Mane / The Curlin' Vergin' Queen

Yes, it is a Lara moment... But our girl Iris is definitely plotting a royal takeover.

Possibly the best of the new 'V' covers

V for Vixen

Dear Naomi,

Literally 82 years old and still kicking. Your face is a tranny daydream. Your body the proverbial brick house. Mighty mighty. Let it all hang out, girl.

Since you're probably never going to have kids (I mean why ruin a good thing?) you really need to just adopt Dolly, Ms. Streisand and I. Take us with you to Saint-Tropez, sleepovers at Papa Azzedine's palatial mans, coke parties with Kate. We can take a phone to the temple like a pro.

Love,
AnA

P.S. Loving the Wonder Woman bracelets. Beyoncé has nothing on you.