Oops-There-Goes-My-Kids-All-Over-Your-Face Akimbo / Reflection Erection

When It Comes to Reality, Gaga Perhaps Not the Ideal Go-To Person

As reported by Fashionista, via Going Concern, Gaga's concert, though selling out madly, is losing money. I guess all those Masters of the Universe headpieces and on-stage bathtubs really break the bank. But, so goes the price for mind-blowing ferocity.

Back to Black

Calvin Klein show-stopper (and starter), David Agbodji setting hearts aflutter in the new S/S 10 campaign. Meanwhile, Ms. Ross needs a moment alone with this image in the bathroom. xoxo

Break-My-Hymen Simon Akimbo / G Spot

Yeah there are other people in these photos, but no one (even you Miss Vodianova) is serving it like our boyfriend. He is OWNING these shots and Mama Tyra would be proud... Plus, I'm wet so that's good.

Red Carpet Rundown

Apparently the People's Choice Awards were last night.

Feeling Peckish...

I stepped out for a little snack.

Perfection Thou Name is Kloss

Inner Monologue: Strap me into a sky-high tranny heel and turn me loose. Walking, working, uh-oh wobbling--fall without falling! And deathdrop! Flat on my ass and they're still rolling. Give it, Karlie! High fashion shrug! Get up with a hunch, atta girl. No one's suspected a thing. Throw it on the cover of Vogue Italia and call it a damn day. I'll be pretending to eat in my dressing room if you need me.

Break-My-Hymen Simon Akimbo / Vers in Versace

Apparently someone important has been reading our little blog, because our number one beau, Simon Nessman is just everywhere.

Meisel I'm looking at you...

Mouthed and Agape / If You Like It Then You Better Put A Quilted Chanel Doughnut In It

Words are utterly failing me in my attempt to describe the perfection of this editorial. Finally something worth celebrating!! Something that actually leaves me speechless (so speeeeechleeesss).

Sure, the other plus-size photos were OK - but we, girls, have reached epic proportions in this gem.

All Chanel, all blonde, all gaping, all tits, all tranny, all eleganza extravanganza.

This bitch owns everything... and if you're looking, I'm pretty sure you can find it under one of those rolls.

Based on the Novel 'Turning It' by V

Future Oscar and current Golden Globe nominee, Gabourey 'Gabby' Sidibe, star of Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire graces the cover of V, out January 14th. All I can say is big girl, you are beautiful.

V's doing this big ole size issue --which looks great-- so clearly they couldn't let the girl just have a cover. Instead, its one of two. The other features future multiple Oscar-winner and a personal fave of Dolly, Dakota Fanning.

Kittenish. Big 60s hair. Flawless. But does anyone find offense with the captions, "Big Love" and "Little Lady?"

Settling: Akimbo Edition

Well it seems my efforts to break up Marc and Lorenzo have proven...well, fruitless. Apparently they were married in St. Barts. Some say it was a rehearsal. I say I could care less. Am I jealous? Obvi. Will I try to invade their conjugal bed then unceremoniously kick out Lorenzo the first chance I get? You betcha! Married or still engaged, I think we all know this will end up in gay divorce court. Let's just hope Marc had that chubby tart sign a pre-nup.

P.S. Is that the ghost of Robert Redford in the background?

What We Don't See Is Her Brutally Assaulting Those Little Chilluns With Her Adorable Toy Phone

Also of note, the fact that she has been wearing the same size for the past 60 years.

2 Minutes in Photoshop, an Eternity in Our Hearts.

Behold! The new S/S 10 Balenciaga ad campaign! Featuring Mirte Maas and Patricia van der Vliet juxtaposed alongside a giant Iselin Steiro. The more I look at this, the more I want to throw up. For various reasons...most good.

Ba-Ba-Barbie Doll

Well, I'm in love. This little hottie has my heart -- he ate my heart out -- with his spot-on Gaga dolls.

Mattel, you're irrelevant. Push these into mass production and gain back that market share from those bobble-headed Bratz skanks.



A very large part of me just wants to drench this in blood and hang it from the ceiling of my apartment. And cue my theme for Christmas 2010.

And finally, an outfit befitting a queen. A real lady one too.

Sometimes, You Just Need to Get Away

After a protracted illness (read: rehab) AnA is back and ready to tickle just about whatever we can reach and of course what you'll allow us (read: we're not above rape).

And what better way to say "Hey Gay", then with the four biggest trannies we've ever had the distinct, be-turbaned pleasure of meeting: Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte. That's right, kids. They're back. Whether you wanted it or not.

After seeing this, though, we're kind of glad they trekked through the desert (read: there's no plot) back to us. It's like seeing some old friends you never even knew you missed.

It's good to be back. Now, let's all get ready for Liza in a bodysuit and what will surely be the gayest moment in film history.