I know what you're thinking: Why, with all the delectable, firm-pec'd, super man candy all around, is she clawing at my one, bony sauerkraut shoulder? At first I thought that it was just a gesture of affection, then I realized to whom I was referring...Notice how my delicate head is hanging, languidly, against that China bang. How gaunt my usually preternaturally perky cheekbones look. How I seem to be crying out from behind these Aryan blue eyes. She's sucking the life right out of me! Shhhh!
She'll hear us.
Help me.
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