Friday, February 6, 2009

Dear God, It's Me Simon

I'd like to thank you again for giving me these impossibly high cheekbones, pillowy lips, gorgeous deep-set brown eyes, divine bone structure, and of course, these PERFECT curly locks. Although it's hard being this utterly perfect (these queens backstage fawning over me is getting somewhat tired) I feel up to the challenge. I promise to spread my beauty far and wide.I vow to saunter down the runways of the world as long as these legs will carry me.  I hope to give pleasure to the thousands who touch themselves at the sight of my boyish pecs. I dedicate the boatloads of spilled seed to you. 

In the name of our savior, Naomi, Amen. 

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